Recently a liberal columnist in the local paper, reprinted this article by a man named John Carlson, who says the best way to tell Republicans from Democrats is by observing how they act during the holidays.
I found my acts/favorites, would make me a member of both parties, so as a Christmas treat, I thought I would share this with all of you. Merry Christmas and I hope you enjoy it.
Republicans say "Merry Christmas!"
Democrats say "Happy Holidays!"
Republicans help the poor during the holidays by sending $50 to the Salvation Army.
Democrats help the poor by giving $50, one buck at a time, to panhandlers on the street.
Democrats get back at Republicans on their Christmas list by giving them fruitcakes.
Republicans re-wrap them and send them to in-laws.
When not in stores, Republicans use a catalog.
Democrats watch for "incredible TV offers" on late-night TV.
Democrats do a lot of their shopping at Costco and Wal-Mart.
So do Republicans, but they don't admit it.
Republican parents have no problem buying their kids toy guns.
Democrats refuse to do so. That is why their kids pretend to shoot each other with dolls.
Republicans spend hundreds of dollars and hours of work decorating the yard with outdoor lights and Christmas displays.
Democrats save their time and money and drive around at night to enjoy the scenery.
Democrats' favorite Christmas movie is "Miracle on 34th Street."
Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "It's a Wonderful Life."
Right-wing Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "Die Hard."
Republicans always take the price tag off any expensive gifts they buy before wrapping.
Democrats also remove tags from pricey gifts ... and reposition them to make sure they are seen.
Republicans wear wide red ties and green sport jackets during the festive season.
So do Democrats, all year round.
Most Republicans try, at least once, enclosing indulgent, wretchedly maudlin form letters about their families in Christmas cards.
Public ridicule from Democrats usually discourages them from doing it again.
Democrats' favorite Christmas song is "Deck the Halls."
Young Democrats' favorite Christmas song is "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer."
Republicans' favorite Christmas song is " White Christmas."
Young Republicans' favorite Christmas song is "White Christmas."
Cheapskate Republicans buy an artificial Christmas tree.
Tightfisted Democrats buy a real tree, but they wait until the week before Christmas, when the lots lower their prices.
Democratic men like to watch football while wives, girlfriends or mothers fix holiday meals.
On this, Republicans are in full agreement.
Republicans see nothing wrong with letting their children play "Cowboys and Indians."
Democrats don't, either, as long as the Indians get to win.
Republicans first began thinking like Republicans when they stopped believing in Santa Claus.
Democrats became Democrats because they never stopped believing in Santa Claus.
Discussing faith, business, personal finance, news (business and financial related), politics, and pretty much everything else.
Republicans lobby to repeal usury laws and then open payday loan stores which charge 500 percent APR.
ReplyDeleteDemocrats moan about payday loans and try to regulate the sector out of business.
Democrats lobby to enact exclusionary zoning ordinances which artificially restrict housing options for the poor, in order to keep the poor out of their neighborhoods. Then they tax you in order to build public housing in someone else's neighborhood to warehouse the poor.
Republicans lobby to enact the same exclusionary zoning ordinances to keep the poor out of their neighborhoods - then they shrug when the poor ask where they are supposed to live.
it's interesting Terry brings up regulating PayDay loan sharks...I am working on a story about that topic that I will publish early next year....probably sometime between Jan. 9 and the 15th.
ReplyDeleteThere are a couple of people I need to interview when they arrive in Topeka in January.
Interesting one about Wal-Mart considering it seems to be DEMOCRATS ( I am neither, FWIW) complaining most loudly about Wal-Mart, being protectionist,etc. A lot of Democrats don't want to admit shopping at the "evil" Wal-Mart ( see John Edwards).
ReplyDeleteMerry Chrismtas,
Greg
Let me just say - I'm a Democrat. Then I would need to heartily relate to you, as I have and always do "Merry Christmas, don't take my Christ out of Christmas".
ReplyDeleteI don't remember the last family gathering with out guns or some other dangerous weapon. My whole family has taken a gun safety course and all have weapons. The baby is the best shot. We even have posts, incase we are invaded.
I do hand my money to the poor and not the Salvation Army. I do NOT want them taking a cut - 100% where it belongs and where I see it working.
Late Night TV - I can't stay up late, even if I wanted too.
No Costco in my area and Wal-mart is the lone wolf here. So ok. 50%
It's A Wonderful Life - Always, no contest.
The local airport says they can land air craft by our lights, no driving around here. We got it all.
No Pricy gifts here - whatcha think that means?
Christmas Song Favorite - "On This Day", by Reba McEntire. It says it all.
Yep, a real tree I have. I have learned that the fake ones release contaminents that are killing our earth. Plus real is soooo good!
We eat all day long - while guys and gals together watch football.
Cowboys & Indians - Dude, the biggest gun wins - refer above. That would be the Cowboy.
Santa Claus to me is alive in spirit. He represents the eternal life that God has Given us - A gift!
So, tell me my friend...where am I???
D -
ReplyDeleteI have to agree
Walmart and sam club is all that's here--no Costco here either.
My favorite Christmas song is Grand Got Run Over...if for no other reason then the sheer humor.
I agree with you on Santa...from a Christian standpoint he represents God...in that he gives without seeking any thing in return...ie: the spirit of giving.
My favorite movie would have to be Jimmy Stewart's "It's a Wonderful Life," but I wonder if that's because it gets so much airplay...I can't remember the last time I seen Mirical on 34th Street playing on TV. Not sure I can even remember the details of that movie.
I am a Republican, but when it comes to issues such that effect the poor and such, I tend to be more at odds with the Republicans as I am more moderate on those issues...largely due to my time of living with the poor in Chicago's inner-city as a missionary to these "street people."
As for Merry Christmas, I say Merry christmas, however, I don't get upset when someone says happy holidays, I get more upset when stores call Christmas Decorations, Holiday decoration, because they "don't want to offend anyone," yet they don't sell menorah's or dradals. If they truely didn't want to offend anyone, they would sell these items for the other holidays and religious days.
I use an artificial true, when I actually put one up and I would rather drive around and look at other peoples decorations rather then putting my own.
That was pretty funny!
ReplyDeleteMerry Christmas and Happy New Year! I wish you a financially great 2007 from a fellow NCN Network member!